I honestly think you should talk to someone about this. This phobia of yours could be the byproduct of some past trauma that maybe you haven’t fully dealt with. Yes, this is a great sub with positive people but maybe you owe it to yourself to get some guidance from a professional. Best of luck and congratulations on your amazing progress.
I have the reverse lol, I get tons of dreams where I’m skinny again (skinny dreams) and then I wake up disappointed :(
I think you just have to love yourself at any weight, and know that everything is temporary (even weight gain and loss). It took me a long time to accept that I’ve gained quarantine weight so fast. But you just have to dust yourself off and try again. Don’t get discouraged, weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint.
I’m also terrified of becoming overweight again, but I try to tell myself that it won’t happen again and I can always lose the weight again with IF.
I have had issues with my weight since I was child. I have been very fit and an athlete at points in my life, and always had insecurities about my weight. When I put a bit of weight on, just a small amount, I started to tell myself I was fat again. And when I told myself I was already fat, I also told myself that it didn’t matter what I ate or drink. It took me about 120 pounds to realize that I could have made changes at any point, and I have to stop hating myself. Its a long journey the other way. No meal feels better than feeling healthy. Ive found I need to stop torturing myself, and learn to love myself. It isn’t easy. I wonder if you are experiencing the same thing.
Dreams are a reflection of your waking life and thoughts. Unfortunately annoying that they can highlight our negative feelings at times.
I had regretful experiences that I repeatedly dreamt about while I was still working through the aftermath of. Now that I am more healed I don’t have them anymore. :) You’re on the right track with therapy.