First all, major hugs and congratulations on your accomplishment!
It’s kind of wild that for some of us, once we’ve achieved our goal weight or close to it, it’s almost like we’re even more critical of our bodies!
I don’t have any advice except to say you aren’t alone, and I think this is time where you have to maybe get a little ‘self-helpy’ and try to rewire your brain.
I tend to yo-up, and every time I’m at my higher weight, I tell myself I won’t take my lower weight for granted - but then I get to my lower weight and I’m still just as miserable and even more self critical.
It’s like when we’re heavier we kind of think everything will be SO MUCH better when we’re at a lower weight .. and it just usually doesn’t work that way. Our skin is different or our body comp is different (I have hip dips which are apparently very unattractive to have I discovered via the internet lol) so I think you’ve done the physical part - now you gotta work on the mental part.
Sorry to ramble on, your post just hit close to home!
So I’d not be too fussed about visual markers as of yet. People like me who are diabetic do this as a lifestyle. I became diabetic because of a poor diet and because I became overweight. If you do IF right, and go slowly and gradually you could take a few years to get where you want to be. Don’t be in a rush. We all get where we want to go, but it takes us different periods of time.
this post says seeking advice, so my advice is get help from a psychiatrist. sounds like you have some serious psychological issues that require professional attention. this sub cannot fix the deep underlying issues you’re suffering from.
A lot of people assume if they lose weight that they will be happy, confident, and sexy. It’s a harsh realization that 10-100 extra pounds aren’t the barrier to happiness people think they are.
I second that you should get some therapy, especially before you get plastic surgery. Look at people that go in for one nose job and end up with completely redone faces. Everyone thinks fixing one physical flaw will make their whole lives happy and complete and it’s just not true.
I can relate to this. I’ve been on IF for 2 weeks only, but been losing weight from around 7 months. I’ve lost 40lbs, and the amount of ups and downs have been a lot.
Nobody mentions it, everybody might have it but maybe that is what normalized it, but I think you are into some body dysmorphia as I am.
I went through difficult months. One that comes into my mind is one when, while I train around 5 times a week, I moved to a new house, and while setting up in this new home, I couldnt cook healthy food and went for fast food for several days. Prior that month, I lost around 8 pounds, which for me was a lot, and as soon as I started eating this food I feel that I gained weight. I looked at my face and I felt more fat, more cheeks, and my belly bigger. Also, some of my sweat pants felt again tight. The mirrors can’t lie, right? I told that to my trainer. I even cried when telling him.
And the whole month, while I trained hard, couldnt feel less overweight. Never lost more than 8 pounds in any month, and the medical monthly check came again. I was so depressed from putting again so much weight but, oddly enough, once I put myself on that scale, I realized I lost 15 pounds. 15!
That was double the amount of the past month, and I ate bad, and my body felt bigger. I knew something was going on.
Funny story? That feeling of seeing myself bigger or much more fat right after eating a burguer is not gone. I hate my man boobs, and there are days, that, even by getting so close to my goal, my body still doesnt look as it is supposed to look. I was in family therapy and never shared that part during the sessions but I opened up and upon some weeks of therapy, I was diagnosed with that body dysmorphia.
It all made sense. I was supposed to feel great, and somedays I do, but guilt and self perception is flawed. I have a lot of things to work on with myself, but Im not planning to stop. Im not saying you have the same, but chances are that this can give you a different perspective of yourself.
The mirrors can lie. Even clothes can. Pictures and taking measures of your body (instead of just putting yourself in a scale) does help to see factual results, measurable results, so don’t let your mind lie to you. It will. And it will be difficult to ignore it, but keep working. Believe in the process. Be positive and nice to yourself.
I send you the best of hugs from afar, I believe in you, you have amazing things and results to see. You’ve come so far and did better than before.
Watch some videos about body dysmorphia on Ted Talks, that was really helpful, and for sure, look for also mental health.
Take care!